As we have discussed here in this space since our first column in 2007, https://nyfamilymediation.com/news/a-mediators-role-as-a-neutral-facilitator/ neutrality is a form of deep connection between the mediator and the parties to conflict. It is the primary pillar of mediation. Neutral as to outcome and impartial in helping all sides to the conflict find mutually agreeable solutions, the mediator advocates for informed, autonomous decision-making and full disclosure. But, decidedly, the mediator does not seek specific outcomes.

The mediator brings neutrality to bear by supporting each party participating in a discussion of values, goals and interests. Ideally, this takes place with reference to the law and to the parties’ particular set of circumstances. That means the details of a settlement may be uniquely tailored to the specific facts of the parties’ conflict. For example, we often see parties in a divorce case decide to take into account the history of their relationship, pre-marriage. In mediation this may be a critical factor in determining equitable distribution, though the law draws a distinct line at the date of marriage.