While I am on the subject of machines we deal with daily in the office and the overwhelming temptations they inspire in us to discharge large bore shotguns in their direction when they malfunction or consume time which would otherwise be billable for reason or reasons unknown to any but the most technologically sophisticated or those with psychic powers, let me mention my Computer. Hmm. I didn’t capitalize that. I wonder what happened? Operating the key to shift the case doesn’t seem to do anything. Never mind. I’ll just keep writing.
My Computer is beautiful. It is also powerful. I praise it, because it is undoubtedly aware that I am writing about it – I know it is. If I were to say what I really thought about it, I would have to go to another Computer to set down any grievances, because my Computer would unquestionably and expediently shut down spontaneously and refuse to function. It would have to be specially caressed, reconfigured and repaired by someone who is on vacation. In Fiji. For three weeks. Just a moment, while I move to another Computer.
