A federal appeals court rejected the arguments of a woman that a sheriff’s deputy acted unconstitutionally in her simple battery arrest and raised eyebrows with its opening paragraph.

“You can’t make this stuff up,” wrote Judge Kevin Newsom of the Atlanta-based U.S. Court of Appeals for the Eleventh Circuit. “We have hair-pulling, wrist-scratching, face-punching, and rock-throwing—all the makings of a good old-fashioned schoolyard scrap. But alas, the combatants in the fracas underlying this Fourth Amendment case were grownups—sisters, in fact. Sheesh.”