Bollocks! Excuse our French, but The Diary has spent the last fortnight fielding e-mails in response to our decision to translate the winning entry to last month’s caption competition – “Fuck off!” “No you Fuck off!” – into, er, Francais.

The caption, an imaginary exchange between Ashurst Morris Crisp and Fried Frank Harris Shriver & Jacobson on the break-down of their merger talks, was originally in English.