It seems The Diary’s unique blend of gossip, clumsy satire and random abuse is occasionally more accurate than any editor could reasonably hope for.

Indeed, as Brian Barwick and his fellow Football Association greybeards coyly wink and nod in the direction of super-suave Portugeezer Jose Mourinho, it emerges that a prospective candidate touted in these very pages only just missed out on the one job in the country with a more generous ‘work done: cash earned’ ratio than being a City partner.