An unusual lawyerbasher comes this week not from the media, as is traditional for this much-loved column, but the US customs service, which The Diary encountered on route to the IBA’s annual piss-up in sunny San Francisco.

The unexpected attorney-assaulting came when one grumpy-looking official asked your faithful scribe his business, to which The Diary proudly responded that we were attending a prestigious legal conference.
“So you are a lawyer too?” asked the official.