In this age of relentless beauty parades, The Diary is pleased to offer our readers in private practice some advice on what not to say when trying to persuade a prospective client that you have a future together.

The advice comes via the general counsel of a Ftse 100 company, who was told by one partner vying for work: “My job is to make you look good.”
“Well I’m in trouble then, aren’t I?” came the retort.