Georgine Howe was almost beside herself with conflicting emotions when she talked to New Haven, Conn., family lawyer Laura S. Mitler early this past spring.

On the positive side, Howe’s twin sons from her previous marriage were to turn 19 on June 1. The boys were accomplished students and athletes in the small town of Bozrah, Conn., and were headed for college in the fall. In addition, after years as a homemaker, Georgine Howe was completing training to become a nurse.