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Let’s consider the term splitting. As used in psychology, the term refers to a set of defenses used by some individuals unable to grasp that not only do they, but others as well, contain characteristics of humanity that are both good and bad. They go from one relationship to the next, first idealizing the other, then devaluing him or her, in an emotionally violent roller coaster that some refer to as “drama,” or “high maintenance.”

Splitting perpetuates the predominant view of the self as devoid of worth, which leads those engaged in it to a persistent search for the ideal other, which, when found is subsequently devalued. The simplistic view of “good” and “bad” is thus preserved.

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