| It's almost upon us: Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa. This is the time of year when lawyers look up from their file-strewn desks, sigh deeply and ponder, "Do I give my assistant a gift, and if so, what?"
There is a case for going giftless. A legal assistant isn't part of a lawyer's family, and neither is she a friend. She's a co-worker — a professional who need not be tipped like wait staff or a parking valet. Some assistants find it embarrassing to receive a gift from a lawyer; when that lawyer never expresses appreciation any other time, a gift at Christmas can even seem condescending.
What's more, exchanging gifts with the boss places a burden on the staffer, who is just as puzzled about what to get his lawyer as the lawyer is about what to get him. And worse, the assistant has a lot less money.
That said, there is a strong tradition of holiday giving in firms, and the trend can be hard to buck. If an assistant doesn't receive a gift from a lawyer, she might think he's dissatisfied with her work. Some assistants even view gifts as hard-earned compensation for occupational hazards such as late nights, overwork and lack of respect. Thus, failure to give can hurt the working relationship.
In a perfect world, a lawyer could ask his assistant her preference. One veteran secretary simply told her lawyers she didn't want gifts from them and wouldn't be giving them any. But few legal professionals are that relaxed about the matter, so most lawyers decide to err on the side of caution and give.
Staffers who don't observe Christmas can present a special quandary, but a large majority of them do expect to receive the same treats as their believing co-workers.
When it comes to gifts from boss to employee, cash is king. It's simple, stress-free and accepted in even more places than Visa. Nothing beats a few crisp greenbacks tucked into a nice card that reads "thanks for all you do."
For the cash-squeamish, store gift cards are fine, but they complicate matters a bit. First, the card should be to a store where the assistant is known to shop regularly or aspires to shop. Second, never give a small-denomination gift card for a big-ticket retailer. Few experiences are more frustrating than walking around an up-market home furnishings store with a gift card that won't even buy a set of napkin rings.
Generosity is the order of the day, but there are no hard-and-fast rules. When deciding how much to spend, there are a number of factors to consider: the size of the lawyer's own salary and bonus, her years of practice, how long she has worked with her current assistant and her assistant's level of helpfulness. Generally, senior partners receive the most support from secretaries, so they should give the largest gifts. A good range is between $100 and $500.
Sincere Appreciation
From the imprudent to the laughably bad, some gift ideas are better left on the shelf.
• Visa, MasterCard and American Express gift cards : Unbeknownst to the givers, these seemingly versatile gifts nearly always come with annoying strings attached. Inactivity fees and reactivation fees chip away the balance. A merchant may decline the card if its value is less than the purchase amount, with no option for the recipient to pay the difference with cash or another card. With some cards, it can be impossible to use the last few dollars remaining.
• Clothing or toiletries : One Christmas, I received a beautiful sweater from a lawyer but was dismayed to find it quite snug and low-cut. I was baffled — he had never done or said anything untoward — and he might have wondered why he never saw me wear it. My boss should have given me something impersonal and saved the clingy knits for his wife.
• Food or alcohol : Those Godiva chocolates wouldn't make such a thoughtful present for an assistant who is allergic or dieting, and forget the bourbon if there's any chance she's a recovering alcoholic or a nondrinker.
• Re-gifts or anything found while cleaning out a closet : Recycled gifts are rarely a good idea. The odds of an assistant actually wanting something her lawyer found while preparing for a garage sale are virtually nil. I'm still wondering what to make of that bag of perfume samples I received a few years ago — especially since I don't wear perfume.
• Candles : Every woman's holiday pet peeve. We have enough scented wax pillars already, thank you.
The worst gift a lawyer can give a staffer is one he doesn't want to give. If the present can't be offered in sincere appreciation for a job well done, it's best to skip it. Regardless of how a lawyer chooses to observe the holiday with his assistant, the best way to show gratitude is to simply tell her how much he values her contributions to his practice and to do so more than once a year.
The Assistant-at-Law has worked for law firms large and small, in various capacities, for more than 15 years. Currently, she is a legal secretary for a Texas-based international firm. Have a question for the Assistant-at-Law? E-mail her at assistantatlaw@gmail.com.
